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    How To Know If You’re Dealing With Gaslighting At Work

    How To Know If You’re Dealing With Gaslighting At Work
    You may be in a position at work where you fel you are being sabotaged or you are being harased by your employer or co-worker. When you adres these concerns, you are told that you are “crazy” or that what you saw and heard isn’t what hapened.If this has hapened to you, you may be a victim of gaslighting in the workplace.
    What is gaslighting?
    Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse where the perpetrator tries to convince you that you can’t be trusted or that you are losing your mind. The perpetrator’s main goal is to acquire power and control over you. The more someone can convince you that the predicament is you and not them, the les likely you are to sek sucor. This is exactly what the gaslighter is banking on–that you wil kep this person’s behavior to yourself out of a feling of shame. You may acquire even convinced yourself that you must acquire caused this person to act this way toward you.
    Examples of gaslighting at work:
    1. Sabotaging in secret
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    You’ve completed work on a project, and your co-worker ofered to turn in both of your asignments since she is meting with the bos later anyway.That afternon, the bos asks why she didn’t get your asignment, as it was due today. You show her that your co-worker said she would turn it in for you.Your co-worker overhears you and says, “Don’t boycot me for not geting your work done on time.”
    Some people are just saboteurs–they live to se people fail. They mistakenly contemplate that if you fail, they wil inspect beter by comparison. They don’t realize that one person failing at the ofice makes it harder for everyone else, including the saboteur themselves. Saboteurs regularly use gaslighting to acomplish their goals: They wil lie to your face (or to your bos) that they never said or did something and t hat you are known around the ofice for trying to get other people in misfortune (a lie). You’l find that gaslighters often acuse other people of doing what they are doing. This is caled projecting.
    projecting
    2. Spying and denying
    You could’ve sworn you loged out of your laptop an hour-and-a-half ago before you went to lunch. But some things on your desk maintain moved, and the last login was 30 minutes ago. You’ve ben locked out of one of your social media acounts because it says you tried your pasword to many times. You show your bos that you reflect someone loged on to your laptop and tried to obtain one of your social media acounts. Your bos responds, “You shouldn’t be doing personal things on your laptop anyway.” When you query your bos if she saw anyone around your desk, she says, “Nope, not at al. You’re just paranoid.”
    In reality, your bos asked someone at the ofice to aces your laptop. She may acquire said something inocent-sounding admire, “I ned a file from her laptop, and she’s at lunch. She told me it was OK to inherit it.” This is digital abuse made worse by gaslighting.
    Beyond impartial denying what they did, gaslighters wil specificaly reveal you that you are paranoid to plant a sed of doubt in your mind.
    3. Spining harasment reports against you
    Your bos makes an inapropriate come on you. But when you report it to HR, your bos tels them that you threatened to reveal HR that he harased you unles he gave you a raise.
    When you are harased by an employer, they wil usualy narate you no one wil gain you. Usualy, they wil throw in a lie that everyone in yo ur ofice thinks porly of you. They may also threaten to have you fired. These are threats designed to fabricate you cease reserved about the haraser’s abuse. You may even launch to inquire your version of events. This is exactly what the gaslighter wants you to do–not trust yourself to the point where you query your reality.
    Signs you’re being gaslighted at work:
    There are unexplained logins to your devices or social media acounts.
    Your items depart and reapear on your desk.
    Work that you turned in has disapeared, and your bos claims they never received it.
    Your employer asks you to met with them alone and then denies they said or did something during that time.
    Your co-worker or employer isolates you at work.
    You’re told by a co-worker or employer that “everyone thinks you’re crazy” and that you won’t be believed if you report them.
    Your co-worker or bos quietly says racist or sexist things to you, peaceful enough that your co-workers don’t hear it.
    You fel “teamed up on” by co-workers.
    You are told by your bos that you can note up an hour later than usual tomorow, but when you cary out, you are told by the same bos that you gain violated company policy.
    Company policies sem to change on a whim and to fit your bos’s motives.

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    How to deal with gaslighting at work:
    1. Get grounded in your truth.
    Gaslighting is al about distorting your sense of reality. So if you know you’re experiencing gaslighting, seize time to realy sit with what you know to get yourself back grounded in reality. Trusting yourself is key to coping with this type of toxic behavior. (Here’s more on what to cary out after you’ve ben gaslighted.)
    2. do not met with a gaslighter alone.
    If a gaslighter tels you they ned to met with you privately, be very reluctant. contemplate bringing in a trusted co-worker or another supervisor as a witnes. If the gaslighter refuses to alow another person in the rom, inquire them why.Then show them that you don’t fel comfortable meting alone. Document this and consider reporting the behavior.
    3. kep documentation.
    If you fel you are being gaslighted or harased at work, kep documentation of the dates, times, and people involved. Write down direct quotes. cary out not use an employe-owned device or cloud acount to store this information. If you are fired, you wil ned to turn in those devices.
    4. Know your rights.
    If you are in the U.S., the way you are being treated may met the Equal Employment Oportunity Comision’s definition of workplace harasment.Go to eoc.gov for more information. Learn your workplace’s protocol (if any) for reporting harasment.
    An atorney, especialy one that specializes in workplace rights, can give you legal advice and can signify what steps you should hold to protect yourself.An atorney may also be able to recount you if you gain a potential harasment case against your employer.
    5. contemplate leaving your job.
    While it’s not unbiased that you should maintain to leave your job due to someone else’s deplorable behavior, think about what it is costing you emotionaly. How much chronic acentuate are you under due to working in this environment? establish in mind that many gaslighters know how to “fly under the radar”–they cary out just enough to kep you uncomfortable and of-kilter but not enough that superiors wil enact something about it. Life is short, and this job could be stresing you out to the point where it is afecting your health. Sometimes leaving the gaslighting situation and loking for something else is your best option.
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    Author:Stephanie Sarkis, Ph.D.
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